Ways to Handle a Divorce Peacefully

Ending a marriage is always stressful, but there are ways to handle it peacefully. 

A divorce can bring about a range of emotions, so it's important to be mindful of how you communicate during this process. 

Talking about your feelings in a judgment-free environment without your spouse present can help you deal with the difficult emotions that may be associated with the decision to end your marriage. 

1. Communicate with your children 

Children of any age can feel overwhelmed by the divorce process. It can also affect their school performance, relationships with other kids and family traditions. 

As with adults, it’s important to communicate clearly with your kids about what will change and what won’t. This includes addressing their questions about who will live where, when they’ll see each parent, school pick-up schedules and other information that will help them navigate this major transition in their lives. 

Parents can also help children deal with the separation by talking to them about how it’s affecting their feelings. This is especially true with younger children who may not have developed coping skills or resources yet. 

2. Communicate with your partner 

When you talk to your partner about divorce, keep it positive and honest. Don't rehash the past, but explain why you feel a divorce is right for your marriage and why it's best for you and your children. 

The way you handle this conversation will influence how your divorce unfolds, so it's important to be respectful and understandable. 

Your emotions will be raw, so it's natural to want to make things better, but letting your hurt feelings drive your communication can lead to pettiness, revenge tactics and other poor behavior. 

If your partner has a family member or friend that they trust who can communicate with them on their behalf, encourage it. However, be sure to discourage it if it feels like it could backfire on you. 

3. Communicate with your attorney 

One of the most important ways to handle a divorce peacefully is through communication. You will want to be as honest and open as possible with your attorney, sharing all of the information that they need to help you win your case. 

Your attorney will also need to know why you are seeking a divorce. This will determine the trajectory of your case. 

Communicating with your attorney about your children, property, alimony and other

issues are vital to your success in the divorce process. Divorce lawyers in Harrisburg, PA  can help you through this daunting process and ensure everything is taken care of. 

Don’t let sarcasm, insults or shouting take over your communication. These behaviors will only inflame your spouse and move you away from an amicable resolution. 

4. Communicate with your mediator 

During mediation, you will be encouraged to express your concerns and listen to each other. This collaborative approach has been proven to resolve conflict more effectively than confrontation. 

Before your first mediation session, prepare all the necessary information for your mediator. This includes documents and records, such as financial statements, insurance policies and tax information. 

In addition, make sure you have the details on how child support will be determined and if any of your current or future health insurance plans may change as a result of the divorce. 

Mediation is also an excellent way to communicate about any future issues that might arise, such as how you will exchange tax information and who will pay legal expenses. Having this information up front will help your mediator know what to expect and how to best handle the situation. 

5. Communicate with yourself 

One of the most important ways to handle a divorce peacefully is to communicate with yourself. Avoiding self-blame, anger, resentment, and guilt will help you feel calmer and more in control of the situation. 

It’s also important to stay focused on your goals and keep them in mind throughout the process. Rather than becoming distracted by the minutia that arise during the separation, focus on your big picture goals and how you want to move forward.